Our first match of the season is always away to ‘Wandsworth’.  Previous seasons have seen us lending them players as they have been unable to produce a full side so early into the season.  Perhaps the reason is confusion?  There is a Wandsworth Town FC and a Wandsworth Borough FC.  Now Wandsworth isn’t really a town, it is, in fact, a borough.  We allegedly play Wandsworth Borough yet I distinctly heard opposition players calling out “Come on Town”.  Perhaps the confused nomenclature causes confusion with the local players so that some seasons they really don’t know who they’re turning out for at the start of the season?   Anyway, such musings are, as ever with my reports, completely irrelevant to the job in hand namely, the match report.

In the away match to ‘Borough/Town’ this season they managed to produce a full team (Norm’s confusion theory as set out above vanishes in a puff of reality) and, unlike us on the first day of the season, they were reasonably fit - they beat us 5-0.

When they came travelling to Beddington we were fitter than before but would that prove enough to secure the win?  The early scoreline would have suggested that situation was unchanged and we were going to lose again.  They went ahead early (nothing new there then) and they looked much livelier in midfield.  As is often the case (see subsequent match report Old Pastonians - 3.3.07) we were slow off the mark and took an excessive amount of time to settle.  However, the early signs proved to be false as not only did we improve but we won the game.

Slowly but surely we had begun to take charge and then we slipped in to the lead.  I don’t wish to lessen the contribution of others and, in particular, the excellent goal scored by Chris ‘I expect the ball to played straight to my feet so that I don’t actually have to run cos I’m really good at holding the ball when surrounded by opposition players, weaving about and I never get tackled Growler’ Moggridge, a goal which was the almost inevitable result of a brilliant and instinctive shot struck on the turn from the midst of a veritable throng of Borough/Town defenders and was a goal truly reminiscent of his talented, less growling, and much better looking, older brother Steve who occasionally turns out for the Vets.  But Growler’s goal aside, priority mention really must be made of another, who goes by the name of Mark Raven.

There can be no question about it.  The real difference in the game proved to be Mark ‘Never Say Die’ Raven.  It is said by some commentators that he shouts a lot, and there is no doubt that he also has ‘the Hithersay Stare’ (see 2nd paragraph of my Old Pastonian’s report for 23.9.06 for explanation of ‘the Hithersay Stare’), but it is also true to say that Mark’s shouting is always positive, constructive and encouraging.  It is also true to say that Mark never stops working, creating and getting in and amongst the opposition.  What was of more importance on this occasion was that not only was he in and amongst the opposition but he was in and amongst the opposition and scoring goals. Indeed it won’t have escaped the mathematicians amongst you that on this occasion we won the match by a convincing margin of three goals.  Coincidentally, this three goal winning margin was exactly the same number as the number of goals scored on this occasion by Mark ‘Roy of the Rovers’ Raven.   Thus, using the skill of mathematics we are able to deduce that Mark scored a match winning:

The Norm